The Nitty Gritty

So, I've made this blog but have fail in introducing myself to my fellow bloggers. Mainly for the reason that I could write the life story of someone else but I can't even put together a paragraph about me.

To begin with, my name is Crystal, but I go by Mugzie. I'm 21 years old, as of today and I'm attending Saginaw Valley State for a Bachelors of Fine Arts degree. I was raised an only child, seeing that my brother is about 14 years my senior which means I've been spoiled by him too. I've always been interesting in unorthodox things, anime, manga, card games, and odd tastes in J-Pop and K-Pop. Which I do share with (and I'm going to give them nicknames) Toastee (my BFF), Wolf (Second in command), Micki (who is kind of new to the crew) and Arisa. There are also my two SVSU besties Chibi Mia, and Chocolate Bear... but you will get to know them soon enough. And Mimi... who is a nerd... and is following this blog, she's my cousin and my (nearly) life long friend.

Now on to the reason I wanted to start this blog. I've noticed.... my dear friend Toastee, has a confidence level of a bajillion. Her head is the size of a Good Year blimp... this is an understatement. She's in every way my polar opposite... in some ways, she's aggressive but assertive, I'm more passive if anything and though I don't want her aggressiveness (because it is also scary) I wouldn't mind being assertive, which is something I lack indefinitely. And considering that she is surrounded by all these guys that want her, kind of annoys me. I haven't had a relationship... one that wasn't long distance of course that was workable in about... 5 years... and this is not by choice.

I've always treated people's feelings higher than my own which I don't like because I still seem to care about other people liking me. It's like how I was when I was a child, I wasn't liked by a lot of my peers. I lived in a nice house, had a lot of neat toys, and had both of my parents and was treated like a princess... (which Toastee still likes to say and even my mother has told me recently.) I've never really had to defend myself because when I was bullied, my mother or even sometimes, older brother would come to my rescue. They had assertive and aggressive personalities while I was left with the gentle one.

Needless to say, somethings have changed... but I'm still to passive. I've been out of a relationship for 2 years, at first I was taking a break just to get used to being single and to probably look at better prospects... but then a few months turned into a year, me being some kind of fishing bait with no fish nibbling... (I'd probably be one of those... silicon bait tackles)

I guess now it's going to take me a while to condense this enough for it to fit in the author description... shit.

Mmmm Patrick Swayze in Ghost =3

So Christmas went okay, I got my happy juice (coffee) in me and I was feeling good. It wasn't about the presents but the fact that my cousin (who I'm was sure hates me, still kind of does) came and my friends were there with me. Overall, it was amazing... until my aunt came. It's a rather bad story that I do not wish to relive... 


Also thanks to my friend (who gave me a borders gift card) I'm able to get this book that I was going to look up for the blog called The Happy Hook-Up: A Single Girl's Guide to Casual Sex. I thought that it would be a interesting book to pick up, giving you the do's and dont's of casual hook ups. I thought that I was going to test it out a little bit, see what's it's all about.


However, I won't be getting that for 3-8 business days so, we'll just see about the usefulness of that, right?


By the way, I love that movie. 

I've Been Naughty... Very Naughty ;)

Well okay, maybe not. This isn't going to be much of an entry besides me saying Merry Christmas to you all, I'm getting ready for my bad girl New Year and kind of getting annoyed with Christmas preparations. I'm so sick of cleaning and wrapping with a headache and my best friend and her dumbass boyfriend.... but that's okay. I'm going to try to keep positive.

This means I'm going to need coffee.... lots and lots AND LOTS of COFFEE.

That's the only way I'm going to deal with my friend and all her COMPLAINING. >< OH. MY. GOD.

Anyway, you all have a Merry Christmas and I will be having some cool little activities that I'm going to post...

A Time to Reform, Viva La Revolución

For a really long time there was a distinction between the "good girl" and "bad girl" I've come to know. Very early on I've been told that I want to be a good girl, rather than the bad girl... because the good girl is one that gains respect for her chastity and morals while the bad girl is disrespected because she dressed a certain way, talked a certain way that wasn't... well politically and socially correct.

I know what you are thinking... because I thought this to, why would one want to be this "bad girl" if it came with a stigma? Here's why: Being bad doesn't promote being a slut... it promotes being sexy, hot, and having this freedom that does not come with being "good". When you are good you must be respectful, kind, decent and modest. This  may have been alright for me as a 12 year old girl, to be modest and sweet and chaste and innocent... but as a 21 year old woman it seems a bit, immature.

Being Bad Does NOT Mean

@ Being immoral or illegal

@ Acting Cheap

@ Being pornographic or obscene in public

@ Behaving dangerously or acting recklessly

@ Being a sexual contortionist

@ Demeaning yourself or degrading yourself with your sexual behavior

@ Being indiscriminate with your sexual partners

Being Bad Means

@ Loving sex!

@ Being sexually confident

@ Being physically uninhibited

@ Feeling sexual hunger and knowing how to feed it

@ Being assertive and unashamed

@ Being fully integrated

@ Being intensely orgasmic (whatever the hell that means...or however you want to take that)

-Barbara Keesling The Good Girl's Guide.... pg13

You see, this good girl that you are raised to be, is a psychological border, an emotional shackle as you will. One that I've always wanted to break out of, ever since I was a teenager and I was told I wanted to be a good girl at 14, and at 18 I was scolded for loosing my virginity.

I've given it a lot of thought for many years, until one day I was walking past a book rack at Barnes and Noble and the title The Good Girl's Guide to Bad Girl Sex. Jokingly, I picked it up and snickered a little, but then flipping through the pages, I stumbled on to gold, answers to the questions I've never thought there were answers to. For those who've felt like me, you should really go pick it up on Amazon.com, it's fricken amazing!

So I made it apart of my new years resolution to make this transition, I'm sick of being passive and meek. It's not really getting me anywhere but rather hindering me. Which is why I'm making this blog, I'm going to start down this journey and share it with the interwebs... (dear GOD) documenting my progress as I go. I hope that you all support me and that some of you feeling the same as I did, find the solution in my blog and in Barbara Keesling's The Good Girl's Guide to Bad Girl Sex.